Thursday, February 22, 2007

Judge Larry Seidlin Cries Like My Baby

there are like ten billion blogs on this f-ing lunatic internet. thats a whole hell of a lot of redundancy. so how can i make my stupid blog stand out? i'll tell you how i can - i can't; that's how. so i'm just gonna continue writing about CANS (see previous posts).
today, the CANS corpse case judge cried. he cried like a school girl. he cried like my little baby maeve cries when she's hungry and her daddy is typing on the computie (that's how she says computer. she's only 3 months old, the little cutie).
what the hell kind of a fucking judge cries? judge ito never cried. i'm pretty sure judge wapner never cried. judge dredd absolutely did not cry. i don't even think judge reinhold has ever cried publicly. except maybe that one time when he lost his job at All-American Burger and his girlfriend dumped him the next day and then he had to wear that pirate costume for his next job.
Weeping like a newly crowned miss america contestant is not typical behavior for a veteran circuit judge who has probably seen it all in his career. But I have figured this one out. I have cracked this one wide open. You're seeing this here first. There is only one possible reason why this imbecile would cry in this nationally televised debacle. He sees this case as his big chance to break into show business and he's trying to show his range. He sees this whole thing as one huge audition. He has already tried to make jokes, to be serious, to improv, he has delivered a few prepared monologues, and now he has cried on cue. He is hoping to be the next Judge Judy. Maybe they'll call him Judge Jewie.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

good one

Marc said...

I never saw anything like it, until today. He's a basket case, clearly.

bklyn_in_dubai said...

E! tv has already made him a star, showing him talking up all the reporters backstage, crying for the cameras.

Leanne said...

Well said.

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